Some time ago I was the subject of some unduly harsh criticism of my general ranking as a Significant Other after Instagramming evidence that I was about to serve the Mr a weight watchers esque fake pizza for dinner. A weight watchers esque fake pizza with mange tout on it.
I will defend myself as follows:
- The Mr is free to cook his own dinner, any time he bloody likes.
- I really like mange tout, and if millions of freaks across the world are allowed to put the salted bony evil that is anchovies on their pizzas without rebuke, then I’m putting mange tout on mine.
There is one thing, however, that I cannot let myself off the hook for and that is calling these creations ‘pizzas’. I often moan about the negative effect on the perception of unusual food creations by trying to palm them off as just like something better/fattier/gluten free or whatever when they are nothing like that at all. But let us not get bound up again in my vegan fish and chips rant and instead admit the mistake and say: It Was Not A Pizza.
So I am not going to call it a pizza. What is was, was a wholemeal tortilla, spread with salsa and topped with some fresh vegetable items then finished off with black olives and half fat cheese. You chuck the whole thing in the oven and end up 20 minutes later with a satisfying dinner edging up your five a day target for well under 400 calories or about 10 smartpoints (or 6 if you use weight watchers branded tortillas). I promise you this is a lot less than you would score for a proper pizza for one or a fully loaded cheesy burrito type thing. And not a ground up cauliflower in sight.
You will find the recipe easily enough on the Weight Watchers site but I despise their own brand bready items so I use standard wraps and have found it easier to bake these in the oven vs grilling, so whilst I pay total homage to Weight Watchers for the inspiration, here’s how I do it.
Per person:
2 tbspns jarred salsa
1 wholemeal tortilla wrap
Veg such as mushrooms, red onions, peppers, courgette ribbons and MANGE TOUT!!!!!
30g half fat cheddar cheese, grated
5 pitted black olives, halved
Dried mixed herbs
Construct this on a non-stick baking tray. Spread the wrap with salsa which MUST be a fairly thick, jarred sort rather than the fresh dippy type as this has far too high water content and will result in a sloppy mess of a fake pizza dinner. I particularly enjoy the co-op’s own brand fiery salsa for this. If you don’t have jarred salsa use tomato puree instead (but less).
Very thinly slice your veg and scatter it merrily ‘cross your tomatoey tortilla. Don’t layer it too much else you risk the previously mentioned sloppy mess. Top off now with the grated cheese then olives and a sprinkling of herbs. If you want to go hot try chilli flakes or jalepenos too.
Chuck it into a hot oven at 170 for 12 minutes, then whack the heat up to 200 for a further 3-4 minutes or until the tortilla edges begin to crisp up and the cheese is fully melted and bubbly.
Slice and serve with whatever you want, but remember that the low points on this won’t counter out an entire tub of lux coleslaw and garlic bread. It really wont.
Food. Boom. 